Now I bitch about Jesus freaks with good reason, but I've been accosted by a bunch of politically correct busybodies lately who are saying I'm generalizing. Fine, I am, fuck you.
The Jesus freaks I have a problem with are the ones who try to convert me, or the ones who tell me I'm un-American because I don't worship God the way they do. Fuck them too. I give a shit what you do, but when you do it all over me, I got a problem. If I have a problem, you will too in a little while.
Ever hear the song? "This land is your land, this land is my land"? Well this God is my God and this God is your God. We all worship the same fucking guy, assholes, and until the day he comes down here and tells me I'm doing it wrong, I'm doing it my way. Don't tell me that I'm un-American because I don't go to your Holy Roller Church or take Communion. Don't tell my wife she's un-American because she's Jewish. Worship of your God is done with deeds, you fucking nitwits, not by closing abortion clinics or taking away a woman's right to choose. If I want to watch porn, I will, because I'm not a pedophile, not a deviant, and I've seen some of the things that you claim will cause the downfall of Humanity. Didn't fuck me up none. (I was born this grouchy) If you don't like what's on TV, change the fucking channel, don't tell me that I can't see it too.
Since you people like to bandy Jesus' name around all the time, answer me this. What did Jesus preach above all else? What was the theme of his life, so to speak? Fucking TOLERANCE, you pea-brained fucking idiots. One of his best friends was actually a fucking HOOKER. You'd better tolerate me, because I'm doing my best to tolerate you without wrapping my fingers around your neck and squeezing for all I'm worth. Keep your religion to yourself and stop trying to make Jesus freakishness the national spirituality. If you impose yourself on me, I'll . . . well, you know.
I feel better now.