Aaaarrrggghhh!

The New York State Vehicle Emissions Inspection Program SUCKS OUT LOUD!!!!!

(Deep Breath) Do I feel better? (Thinking.) Fuck no!

I don't want to go into all the details, but our inspection machine went down again night before last , the fourth time in ten days. It took two days for the repair guy to get there (two days is good, one time it was twelve), butt boy looks at it and says one component was getting an over voltage (no shit, we shut it down when the smoke began pouring out the fucking thing). "Okay, fine, can you fix it?" Harry asks. (Keeping in mind that Harry pays $4000 a year for the maintenance contract.) "Yeah, but I don't have parts," butt boy replies. "I'll be back tomorrow with some used parts I have to scavenge from one of the other techs."

This is also keeping in mind that Harry has paid the State of New York and ESP (the equipment manufacturer) over $50,000 in costs to be a part of the program over the last 20 years. (In the State of New York, you don't stay open long if you don't do inspections.) Oh, by the way, the stickers cost $1800 for a three month supply. Guess how much we make from each inspection? $2.50. If we inspect a car that passes both safety and emissions tests, we make $2.50. Ain't that a kick in the ass? We make our money with the tires and other shit we can sell when the car doesn't pass for one reason or another. With the current wave of leasing over the last few years, people get rid of their cars before major shit breaks or wears out.

So this is the deal. Maybe we can do inspections tomorrow so we can call all the customers and tell them the machine is fixed and they can bring their cars back. That's if they didn't go somewhere else because their sticker was expired and they didn't want a ticket. Maybe the used parts butt boy will bring will work for more than three days before the fucking thing breaks again. Is some idiot in Albany going to reimburse Harry for the work that we lost because of their piece of shit machine? Doubtful. And the company that makes the machine under contract to New York, what are they doing with their money that their technicians can't get new parts? You know somebody is making big money from this inspection thing, but it sure isn't us.

Welcome to New York, have a nice day.